kai xuan.

countdown: 1 more day to nationals intersch.

And i am feeling pretty fine. Still, my lagging nerves will start to work when the time calls for it (rather not actually). But we will leave it til then, where i will really let my personal quote do the commanding: just zam.
After participating in 3 years' worth of nationals and overseas competitions, i can conclude this: the number of successful major competitions by me can be counted with my one hand. Yep, totally hopeless and rather off-putting. Confidence level has, naturally, drop rather drastically and it seems as though there isn't much of a chance to redeem it back. That is... until now.
Kai3 Xuan2: A chinese phrase which means victorious.
i learnt that phrase from my secondary 3 chinese handbook. Since then, my way of introducing myself and my name will always concern that phrase.
"Hmm... peixuan,what's the 'xuan' in your name?"
"Kai3 xuan2 de4 xuan2, adding a wang2 to the side of it. It means victorious."
So that's my way of introducing myself. Sounds arrogant, but then again i AM proud of that fact. To have something in your name which implies that something good might turn up someday. Course, earlier on it resulted in some endless ribbings from friends (due to some past circumstances). But then again, it's good to know what it means. Kaixuan means victorious. And it's in me.
Yep. I am more hyped up than ever. No way am i gonna let it end up another bout of tears. There's definately no chance that i am gonna let my team-mates down. No way am i gonna sense coach's disappoinment. The determination which has grown much stronger. The confidence, rising. The blazing of firery passion for shooting. The strength from others, encouraging. This year's nationals is going to be different.

Once again, kaixuan means victorious.
And it's in me.